A Life Left Behind
by Cyrus Smart
Summary: What happens when the world changes drastically and you can't cope? What do you do when opportunity passes by without a chance, when you never get to say what you want to tell the most? What do you do when you have to leave your life behind?HG
1. The End of All Things

_Disclaimer: I own nothing it all belong to the great Ms. JK Rowling_

A Life Left Behind

The End of All Things…

"AVADA KEDAVRA"

The noise seemed to echo as Harry saw the cold, evil, red eyes of Voldemort go blank. Then there seemed to be an explosion and Harry was knocked off of his feet, anyone left standing was knocked down as well.

Harry laid there on the ground for what felt like a lifetime. As he lifted his head however, the smoke and dust had just begun to settle. There were bodies everywhere and Harry seemed to be the only one moving.

Next to him through the smoke he could see Dumbledore's body; he had thrown himself in front of a killing curse aimed at Harry. As the smoke and dust began to clear the air some more he could make out more of the bodies, he had seen them die, he had watched as the people around him died, the people he loved die.

He saw the matriarch of the Weasley household lying in front of Mr. Weasley and Bill; she had tried to sacrifice herself for them but it was too late, Death Eaters had them cornered and they all were killed.

The twins had been fighting back to back giving their enemies real hell. George was hit with a flash of green light and just as Fred turned around to aid his brother he was hit by another hex and was sent sailing through the air and slammed into the ground hard not to move again.

Charlie was cornered by a Death Eater and tossed against a wall that then crashed down upon him. Snape had been killed by the Dark Lord himself, after he killed Lucius Malfoy. Neville had gotten his revenge on Bellatrix Lestrange but only to be tortured to insanity and killed by Theodore Nott.

Harry finally got to his feet even though his entire body told him to lie down and die like everyone else had. Where Voldemort had just stood, there was nothing but ashes and a broken wand. He had done it he had killed the Dark Lord, fulfilled his destiny.

All thoughts of rejoicing were quickly obliterated when he looked at the bodies around him again. Across the clearing where Harry and Voldemort had been dueling there were Hermione and Ron holding each other in an intimate embrace. Hermione was hit by a severe slicing hex, Ron, admitting his love for her only days before, was holding her as she died in his arms, and he was then hit by the killing curse.

Percy was not at the final battle; he was instructed to stay at the Ministry and keep an eye out while the minister and everyone else came to Hogwarts to fight. All of the Weasleys were gone all except Percy, Percy … and GINNY!

Harry searched franticly. He had seen her dueling against Malfoy last; she had to be here somewhere.

Harry spotted her long red hair; she was about a hundred meters away. He ran too her ignoring the immense pain it brought to him.

She was lying on the ground with dirt and mud all over her. Harry knelt down beside her and cradled her cold lifeless body.

NOOO! He couldn't lose her too. She was all he had left, all her ever wanted. He loved her.

He had never told her though. He wanted to tell her so many times before but he had to wait, wait to when no one was a target anymore, when they were safe to live happily ever after. How could she have died? It wasn't fair.

Hot tears began to escape Harry's eyes; he didn't try to wipe them away because holding her was more important. He brought her body against his and hugged her hoping she would hug back.

Harry remembered a time when he had the chance to tell her how he felt but decided not to at the last moment. He didn't know why, if he was scared, worried, trying to protect her or not, he just didn't say it. He wished he could go back and tell her but it was too late.

* * *

"_Hey, Harry, what are you doing out here?" Ginny questioned him as she crossed the Quidittch Pitch on here broom._

"_Oh nothing much," said Harry blandly. He noticed an unsatisfied look on her face and added, "…just thinking"._

"_What were you thinking about?"_

_Harry paused awhile contemplated telling Ginny it was her he was thinking about but was interrupted when she added,_

"_You can tell me I won't say a word to anyone," there was a look of caring and compassion in her eyes when she said it. So he started to tell her what he was feeling without revealing too much._

"_Well I really like this girl and I don't know if I should tell her how I feel or not," Harry said cautiously._

"_Hum, well, how much do you like her, is it a crush or is it something more?" Ginny asked_

"_Something more, I think I am in love with her," Harry replied without thinking and quickly regretted saying it by the dark look that flashed in Ginny's eyes._

"_Oh… so who is it?" she asked returning to the comforting attitude she had before._

"_Err," what was he going to say, should he say 'you' or 'I love you', then quickly decided against it, "I can't say."_

_The dark look flashed in her eyes again and lingered a little longer. Harry didn't know if that meant she was upset that she did not tell him or upset by the nature of his response._

"_Well, Harry, the best advice I can give you is, if you really love her that much you should tell her"_

"_Er, thanks Ginny that …er, really means a lot to me."_

"_It really nothing Harry," she said in a cold and distant voice like all of her drive had just been sucked out of her, she sat there for a little while staring into the distance then finished quietly, "don't mention it."_

_

* * *

_

_She said a quick goodbye, turned around and flew back down to the ground._

Harry clutched her next to his never wanting to let go. He cried into her hair as he smelt it one last time.

He gave her another squeeze and looked at her face.

"Goodbye, Ginny"

He leaned over to her face and whispered to her.

"I will always love you."

He than kissed her on the cheek and wiped away the tears that had fallen on her face.

He layed her down gently and brushed her hair away from her face and slowly stood back up.

He looked around again and spotted Remus Lupin a few meters away.

Harry swiftly walked up to him. Lupin had a silver hand poking out of a deep wound on his bloody side and Wormtail next to him, who looked like he bled to death from his missing hand. The silver in the hand must have killed the old werewolf.

That was the last Harry could take of it, he dropped to the ground on his knees next to Lupin. He was the last of the real marauders, and killed by his childhood friend, the same man who had led to his parents and Sirius's deaths. All of the Marauders died at the hands of one of there own.

Lupin was the only tie to family he had left, he couldn't take this; it was too much.

"Oh, Lupin," Harry cried to his dead godfather. "How could this have happened? Once Voldemort is gone everyone is supposed to be okay and we were supposed to be happy. Everyone isn't supposed to die and leave me alone. I have been alone through all of this, you all weren't supposed to leave me alone when it was over, too."

Harry stopped to breathe for a bit and gain a little composure.

"I don't know how I am going to make it now. Ron and Hermione are gone, so I have no friends. You are gone, so now I have no family and Ginny is gone, so I have no one to love. How am I going to live? I have no one, even Dumbledore is gone. What am I to do now?"

as if comign to a sudden conclusion Harry abruptly stood up and looked around at the dead bodies scattering the ground, both friend and foe. He could not take it, no more death, no more war, no more… no more.

He began to run; he had to get away form the loss, the pain. He had nothing left to live for, at least not in the wizarding world.

He ran and ran until the pain became to excruciating; he passed out where he was standing.


	2. Life or Something Like It

_Disclaimer: I own nothing it all belong to the great Ms. JK Rowling_

A Life Left Behind

Life or Something Like it

Harry closed the door to the jewelry shop where he worked and locked it for the night.

Harry was now 20 years old, he had been gone from the wizarding world for 3 years now. He had made himself a nice living as a muggle in the southern district of London.

The only reason he worked in Johnson's Jewels was because it was the farthest thing away from magic. Mrs. Johnson, the old lady who owned the store, told Harry the only reason she hired him was because the ladies thought he was good looking and would stick around longer to buy jewelry. The young ladies that constantly flirted with him did nothing though; his past was to dark to let anyone to close.

He was always trying to block out the memory of that day in May, when the Dark Lord was defeated, but it was almost impossible. The best years of Harry's life were destroyed right in front of him. He had killed them, all of them if he was never born the war would never have happened and they would all still be alive, Ginny and the Weasleys would still be alive.

Harry led a hollow life. He woke up in the morning ate breakfast, went to work, ate lunch, worked some more, locked up the shop at night, went to his flat, ate a lousy dinner and passed out on his bed remembering all he had lost, then woke up in the morning and did it all again.

Harry had given up all magic. He took his wand and robes and put them under lock and key in a safe box under his bed. He never got them out or looked at them, it was just too painful.

He could not control some of his wandless magic though, when ever he got emotional remembering, something would break or the lights would flicker. He tried hid best to control it but it was hard. Sometimes wandless magic would happen unintentionally, he would go to turn on the water in the shower but it would turn itself on. He usually disregarded it when it was on accident.

As Harry left the shop to go to his flat he would ignore his surroundings, unless he saw a flash of red hair. He would see it was Ginny or any of the other Weasleys, but then after looking closer and getting his hopes up he would remember that they were gone.

After this happening many times Harry tried to ignore it, but when a redheaded woman came into the jewelry boutique he would stiffen up, but slowly that passed too.

Harry had ten blocks to walk to his apartment but he enjoyed the walk. His walk to and from home was his only form of exercise, even though he was still fit from his walks he was not as fit as he was before the final battle.

Harry unlocked the door to his flat and entered. He threw his keys down on the kitchen table in his two-room flat and opened the fridge. He pulled out some left over Chinese food and stuck it in his microwave. He put it in for three minute and sat down at the table and began reading the newspaper. There was nothing very interesting in it so he put it down again and got his food.

He ate his leftovers in silence. He hated the silence because it gave him time to think and thinking was not always the most comforting thing.

When he was done he threw away what was left of his food and went into his bathroom and turned on the shower. He absentmindedly washed his hair and rinsed his body. He got out, brushed his teeth and got dressed in his pajamas.

When he was walking back to bed he heard a noise but disregarded it for the city clamor.

He snuggled into his covers preparing himself for another night of restless sleep, occupied with painful dreams of his Hogwarts years. He was almost asleep when he heard it again.

"Tap..Tap..Tap."

The sound was familiar to him but he just rolled over and tried to sleep again.

"Tap..Tap..Tap..Tap."

Finally he looked up at the window, where the sound was coming from, and gasped. There was an owl outside his window and not just any owl.

"Hedwig?"

She only tapped and hooted in reply.

Harry jumped out of bed, rushed to his window and tried to pry it open. He had never opened his window in the three year he had lived in the flat. In the end it came open and Hedwig hopped in.

"Hedwig, what are you doing here? I haven't seen you since before … before… then."

She hooted and stuck out her leg revealing a piece of parchment attached. Harry took the parchment and unrolled it; it was a clipping from the Daily Prophet.

_**The Initiation of a New Minister**_

_A New Minster is to be called into office this Friday, the 13th of April. When Minister Amelia Bones  
decided it was time to retire, her Senior Undersecretary, Percival Weasley, was nominated for the job  
and recently won the election. Mr. Weasley and his family will attend the ceremony and will give the  
traditional acceptance speech. Mr. Percy Weasley has been an active employee of the Ministry since  
he left Hogwarts seven and a half years ago, he has served underneath two Ministers and rose  
fast in his ranks. He started as an assistant of the late Mr. Barty Crouch, then to the assistant to  
the Minister of Magic, Mr. Cornelius Fudge. When Fudge was dismissed from the office, Mr. Weasley  
was promoted to the Senior Undersecretary of the Minister. When asked for a comment on his new  
position, Mr. Weasley stated, "I feel this will be a great leap in my career and am honor to accept this  
responsibly. My Family is very proud and I wish most of them could still be here to show their pride in  
me as well". The ceremony for Mr. Weasley's initiation will take place in the Ministry and will begin at  
six o'clock on Friday. The entire wizarding community is happy to have such an able minister, but is sad  
to see the glorious Ms. Bones to leave._

Harry sat at the kitchen table and saw Hedwig nip at a piece of bread on the counter. The lights began to flicker and the bulb in his bathroom burst at that Hedwig squawked and flew out the window again.

He was in complete and utter shock. 'Mr. Weasley and his family'; what did it mean by 'his family'? They were all dead. All the Weasleys died. Harry saw all of the Weasleys fall, with the exception of Percy who wasn't there.

Harry tried to snap himself out of this state. 'His family' must be his wife and children, the only Weasleys that will be left. He wondered if Percy ever married Penelope Clearwater; that was the only girlfriend he knew Percy to ever have.

Harry felt the urge to go to the Ceremony and congratulate Percy, he never really liked Percy very much but he was a Weasley and they were family to him, so Harry felt himself family.

No, He won't go though. He was the reason all of the Weasleys were dead. If he hadn't been born and that prophecy not made, he would have never met the Weasleys and they would have never been involved in the war.

Harry felt too ashamed to show his face there again. The wizarding world would cause him so much pain, so many bad memories. He left that world, that place, for a reason. Why go back now? Why go back when the only reason to go was to congratulate the last living relative of a family you helped massacre.

Percy would not want to see Harry, Percy never liked him much either. Also Harry wouldn't feel much surprised if Percy went off on him and tried to throw him in Azkaban if he was to show up.

But Harry couldn't take it; he needed to see what was left of the family that loved him, his family, even if they hated him. He would just not show himself to them, they need not see him like he needed to see them.

"I'm going," he said to no one in particular.

At that Harry went to the side of his bed and knelt down. He pulled a safe box out from underneath, he then pulled a chain off from around his neck. On the chain there was a small key that went to the box; the gold chain was a gift that he was going to give Ginny on his last day of Hogwarts, when he was going to tell her how he felt by asking her out.

He turned the key in the lock and put the chain back around his neck, since he never removed it. Inside the box was a bunch of black cloth and a stick.

The cloth was his black school robes that he was wearing when he ran away and the stick was his phoenix feather wand. The robes were just a memento and probably would not fit any more, but the wand was much more.

His wand was powerful, one of the most powerful in existence. It had saved his life and many more before. Because of its similar qualities to another wand it helped him destroy the Dark Lord Voldemort. The wand was his single most valuable possession and it had spent the last three years locked in a small box under his bed never to have a thought dwelled on it for longer than a few seconds.

Harry tried a couple weak spell to get the hang of doing magic again, at least intentional magic. He did the most mild cleaning spells he could think of, so that the Ministry would not pick up magic-use in a small apartment building in a completely muggle part of town.

Surprisingly Harry's magical ability was about the same as it was before he became a muggle. He put his wand down and shoved it underneath of his pillow. He didn't practice too much for people would begin to question.

Harry looked at the calendar that hung on the wall above his kitchen table, the day read the 10th of April. He had three days till Friday, three day to prepare for a world he had been gone from for three years, even if he was only to return to this world for a few hours.


	3. Remembering to Forget

_Disclaimer: I own nothing it all belong to the great Ms. JK Rowling_

A Life Left Behind

Remembering to Forget

A man crept behind a warehouse veiled in the shadows and maneuvering with great stealth. He wished not to be seen so he had a heavy black cloak on with its hood drawn. From afar it would look as if he was up to no good. He, himself, thought he looked like a Death Eater and if it were not pleasant times it would have been possible for a Death Eater to be sneaking around with the festivities going on inside.

Harry Potter was trying to sneak into the Minister's Banquet with out being seen. He did not want to ever return to the wizarding world again, but here he was. Harry comforted himself by say he really wasn't returning, it was only one night, one night to see the last Weasley.

Harry slipped into the back door and slowly made his way down a dark and dank hallway. When he reached the end there was a large wooden door. He knew that if he was a muggle that the door would not be there for the wards that were in place to hide the ceremony.

He cracked the door and edged in hoping no one would notice his entrance and they didn't. Harry was a good hour late for the banquet and therefore missed the dinner and Percy's speech. This way Harry could stand in the back and watch without being noticed too much by the people who were milling around and having various conversations.

The room Harry entered was magnificent. The room was decorated in the Ministry colors, a dark midnight blue and gold. The tall ceilings seemed to generate light of their own because there was no fireplace or candles, the room was filled with round mahogany tables, a bar was in the far left hand corner, and in the front of the room was a stage. The décor was slightly overlooked by Harry though because the room was filled with wizards and witches.

Harry had not been around this much magic in three years, so he was a little dizzy at first but then found the back wall to balance himself. He closed his eyes and tried to right his mind so he could look around at the people without being sick.

Once Harry regained his composure he started to look around but was immediately struck with nausea again when he looked up at the stage.

On the stage stood Percy at a beautiful mahogany podium as if he had just finished his speech, he had a great smile on his face which was very un-Percy. To his right stood what Harry assumed was his family but he did not have the heart to look closer at that moment.

He was glad that Percy could still find happiness even through all the bad that had happened to him and that he had still achieved his goal.

Once Harry again had obtained his balance he looked at the stage again. Percy had moved away from the podium and was talking to the people Harry had assumed was his family. Looking closer at the two people Percy was talking to he was dumbfounded.

The people were familiar to him and Harry had in fact known them. If it was any other day, any other place than this, Harry would have disregarded the idea of the presence of these people but not today, not here, it had to be real.

On the stage next to Percy stood Fred and Ginny or two people who looked astoundingly like Fred and Ginny.

Harry could not move he just remained against the wall and stared at the people on the stage. He stared at the lovely redheaded girl, no, young woman on the stage. She continued to talk merrily to her brothers on next to her as if they were not in front of a very large group of people.

He could still tell however that the war had taken a toll on them. Fred, no longer with his twin George (who Harry could only tell apart by the way they held themselves as they stood), had lost his mischievous smile.

Percy, who was always atop of his game, was slouching a bit and Harry was pretty sure it had nothing to do with him being the new minister.

Ginny, Ginny look just as beautiful as always, the same long red hair, the same slender figure and the same silly grin, but her change was much less distinct. Harry could see the change in her no matter how small it was because it was one of the things he loved about her the most. The war had not left a physical scar on her but it had taken the twinkle in her eye. Her spirit had been broken and that itself broke Harry.

Then there was a pair of eyes staring back at Harry, pair of chocolate brown eyes, Ginny was looking back at him. The twinkle in her eyes suddenly returned, her eyes lovingly gazed into his, Harry felt complete once again in his life.

Just as suddenly the twinkle was gone it was replaced with a look of shock and confusion on her face but did not break their gaze. Her features then changed to that of shame, she broke the stare and shook her head to clear it and then had a nod of resignation at the floor by her feet. She put on a big smile that was obviously strained and returned talking to her brother before having Fred walk off of the stage together.

With her reaction to him, Harry had emotions flood back to him. Was she ashamed of him, she must hate him for what he did to her family and herself. He would not try to catch them or talk to any of them. They looked happy, not entirely at all like they were before, but happy enough with out him. He had destroyed one of the strongest wizarding families and had left them struggling.

Ginny must hate him, if not for killing her family but for the other things he had done to her. He had rejected her love when they were much younger, then he fell in love with her and never told her, broke her heart in trying to pull his friendship away from her to protect her, left her for years to live in the muggle world after leaving her dead on a battlefield. But she wasn't dead as it had seemed to him, yet it didn't seem possible for her to be alive.

Was it possible for her to be alive? Harry asked himself this question as her made his way back to his flat.

She seemed to be so alive there on the stage talking to her brothers. Again, however, he had 'seen' her and her family a million times on the street, only to find that they were in fact anyone but the Weasleys. Was it possible that it happened again tonight; it had not happened in awhile but it was possible with all the magic that Harry was not really used to and the fact that the Percy was there that he could have imagined it again.

The only thing that deterred his logic was her eyes, Harry knew those eyes he loved those eyes her was positive that they were her eyes. But then again Harry had been positive before when he saw a Weasley on the street.

Harry then decided right then and there, as he opened the door to his flat, that it was not real. It was much easier to understand and accept that what he saw was just his mind playing tricks on him again. He decided that he would forget that this night ever happened and go to bed.


End file.
